I got home late this afternoon after babysitting overnight for Maggie and Kylie. I took Reta, our pug with me
because Stuart is farming and she dreaded being alone.( Code for maybe missing a feeding.)
Maggie was attending a big hair show and Kylie went along as an early anniversary get-away.
As I was unpacking my things I ran across Reta's IPad diary.
Yes, my dog has a diary. No, she doesn't have an IPad. We aren't crazy. She shares mine.
She's a good sport with the grands and I think her diary entry proves her commitment to be accommodating.
I thought I'd share it and give her a shout out. She doesn't know I read it so mum's the word if you see her.
Without further ado...
I'm leaving the house. Are we going to the vet? God please, no!!!!
Whew. No vet. I'm at Maggie's house. It's cool. I lived here after the house fire. I can handle this.
What's that ... A baby? Oh...no big deal. Just like me, they like to sleep. Oh oh oh ...they drop food. This. Is. Gonna. Be. Great!!!!
Food. Blessed food. Down here. Drop it baby. Drop. It. Here I am. Come on girl!!
Huh? Outside?! Now?! Whhhhhhhyyyyyy?? Ok, ok I'm going. It's so cold And dark. Oh yeah. Good idea. I needed that. Now, get me to my rug.
What's that noise? Where is Janie going? Quick I must scramble and see what's up. Oh it's the baby. Oh ok. Going sit in here. She's singing. It's nice. Like a squeaky screen door and I'm being lulled.
Where we going? Ok. Back to bedroom.
Huh? What? I'm up. I'm up. I'm coming with you!!!!
I love the clatter of my toe nails on these wood floors. I feel glamorous.
Hmmmm back to bedroom.
No? Oh, the bathroom. My toenails are beautiful. Clickety click.
Hark! I hear that baby! I'm on it. I'm hustling. Hold up.
Well! How rude. I never in my life!! Really, theres no need for name calling!! Snorie McToenail! My name is Reta. I was asleep. Forgive me if I snored. But yes, my toenails are worthy of a shout out.
What's that?? A wrapper. A refrigerator opening? Food! Food!! One of them is eating. Oh they all are.
I'm on it! I'm on it!
Well for now my work is done.
Outside! Heeey. I need to go outside people, puhleese.
This sun feels good.
I'm scratching. Hellllooo. Open that door already.
Thank you Pia for shoving a toy dog against my face while I nap.
No kids. No. I'm not a hand holder. No thank you if you planning on touching my nails?? Don't even attempt to trim my nails. They're my glory. Just last night someone called me Toenails McGee. That's gotta be good, right?
Refrigerator???? Oh, I'm so there.
How nice of you covering me with a baby blanket. Watch the naaaails.
The vet?! No!!! Gah. No!!!
Aww home sweet home.