Friday, March 9, 2012

Decisions



Yesterday was a really hard day.
Dad went into the Alzheimer's unit.
It is what is best for him. 
Putting all our emotions aside,
and getting him the proper care
was much more difficult 
than I imagined.
It literally took the full day to get it done.
We took him out and we sat with him through his supper.
He people-watched and seemed to fit in. 
We slipped out because we knew
 they wouldn't let us sleep there.
Although, I think my sister Linda
 and I were considering it.
I was pretty strong most of the day,
 then I got home
and could barely function.
I have been up and down all night.
I needed to talk to God.
I can hear him at night when it is still.
When I am still.
I have a real problem with still.
But, I think most of you know that.
The director at the Alz. unit is fabulous.
She texted us on and off.
She got him to shower,
something we had major problems doing.
She said he watched some TV
and said he told her it was time to go to bed.
When she was pulling the covers up,
he tweaked her on the nose.
He is doing okay.
He is finding joy.
Now we will too.
If he is happy,
we will all be happy.
I am going in to eat breakfast with my mom 
in a few hours.
She needs your prayers.
71 years is a long time to live together
and now he isn't with her.
But, he is still here.
We can go visit whenever we want.
We have a a new normal to learn.
We are blessed he has a great place to live 
and she does too. 
We can do this.
We can do all things 
through Christ
who gives us strength.
I wanted you to know what was going on.
I feel your love and prayers.
I will be back with my blog fodder soon.
I have some funny pics of my Wed.
with Caroline to share.
Have a great weekend.
Bless you all. 

Those who hope in the Lord
will renew there strength.
They will soar like eagles,
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint. 
Isaiah 40:31

29 comments:

  1. It sounds like you all did the right thing. "Right" doesn't mean easy. I think that is incredible--that the unit manager texted you guys throughout the evening. That is WONderful!

    I am praying for your mother. And you. You need to practice "still" and use it to "recoop" -- physically, for starters. (How ARE you? Any better?)

    I'll be texting you in my thoughts today as you "soldier on" (a phrase Eileen/or was it Elaine used once when she was encouraging ME).

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  2. i can't imagine how hard this is. hugs and prayers for you!

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  3. Love, prayers and ((((((hugs)))))) sent to you ALL. I sooo remember this step with my sweet Great Uncle Jim. It was for the best as he wouldn't eat for my Great Aunt... His temperament had also been changed so much by the diseases rages that it wasn't safe for her. He did better in the unit. My heart goes out to your family. Your wonderful Dad has the best care and an amazing family he made and is loved by The Lord. Breathe deep. Blow it out. repeat. You are all much loved.

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  4. I'm sorry, I personally know how hard this is. I had been looking for places for my father (same illness) but my mother would not commit. Then my Dad had to go to the doctor. The doctor thought he was dehydrated. He knew how bad my father was and he admitted him to the nursing home. He was a handful but settled in. Even though this illness is so sad, sometimes you can laugh. Like the tweeking of the nose. They can be so child like and fun to be with. My Dad adored me in his final days. Before he wasn't like that. I have some good memories that came out of this. You did the right thing. My Dad kept taking off. He walked down a busy highway at 2 in the morning. It was 20 degrees out. He had a short sleeve t-shirt and pj bottoms on and two pair of socks.....no shoes. He ended up walking into a nursing home. Then another time he had his Yorkie and was found walking in a corn field. Some nice lady stopped when she saw him and put him the car. He could have gotten so lost. So your father is safe and cared for while you can rest and visit him. That will brighten his day and yours. Good luck and sending you (((((HUGS))))) and prayers.

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  5. Oh Janie, I have walked your steps my dear sister in Christ. It is a difficult path and you will find that strength for these times does indeed come from Christ. May He give you the peace you will need. Alzheimers is a terrible disease, it was three years ago this month that my siblings & I had to admit my dad into the unit here in Shelbyville. I have to say they are wonderful to work with, kind to Dad and he was comfortable with them. You are in my prayers & thoughts. This is a difficut valley to walk through, keep your eyes looking up to the Father. He is always there!

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  6. Love you, Cousin. I am saying prayers daily for you and your family. It's so hard, isn't it? Something we never expect to have to deal with. Remember you have so many people who are lifting you up in prayer. Stay focused and look at the good.

    Love and Hugs...

    C.A.

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  7. You have my prayers,Janie.

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  8. This is hard. You know where to find comfort and thank God you all have each other.
    Kat at Seeking Sanity went through this. Her father has passed away a few years ago now but she has some really great posts in her archives.
    Your not only not alone in your immediate family but in this big human one, these greifs are shared. I'm glad he is content. He'll have bad days too but at least for now it is a huge blessing that he is calm and content.
    hugs
    KD

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  9. Janie~
    I am sending prayers & positive thoughts to you and your loved ones. It's SO HARD! Take all the HUGS you can get!
    Jackie

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  10. Tears for you..... you are a wonderful daughter and your father is so blessed to have you. Prayers for mom too... how hard this must be, but I'll bet she's strong like her girls and she'll get through this too with their help.

    ((((((Janie))))) gentle hugs from jersey........

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    Replies
    1. crap, just realized I didn't change who I was logged in as - I'm on monster's laptop!!!!! Sorry - it's me - gena !

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  11. New normals are hard to navigate sometimes. Your faith and family will sustain you and old youup when you need it most...although I think you know that. I am praying for all of you...please let your Mom know that as well.

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  12. Prayers for renewed strength and purpose for you and your family, Janie. These kinds of decisions are so terribly difficult to make. I think there simply was no other choices available. Praying very very hard for your mom as well.....I can't imagine not being able to sleep beside the person you have spent the majority of your life with.......
    Much love to you and yours.

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  13. Such a familiar bundle of emotions my friend. My heart breaks for you all. I soo identify with the wanting to spend the night. We when left mom at the care home I cried all the way home. 55 miles. It is a hard but good thing you are doing my friend. And your perspective is great. Yes you can go give your sweet daddy that hug. Praying for your tender heart...and your moma's too.

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  14. many prayers for you and your family....my heart aches for you.

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  15. I LOVE LOVE LOVE that he tweaked his nurse's nose. LOVE IT!!!!!

    Praying for you and yours. Big love spiraling in your direction!!!!!

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  16. I'm sorry that you had a bad day, but, as you know, you did the best thing for your dad. It sounds like he's in a great place and will do just fine. I'm so glad that you have your faith to comfort you.

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  17. So glad you took the tough step. Can't imagine how hard that was but I do think it was the right thing. Take comfort in knowing you are constantly lifted before the throne! Love you my friend!

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  18. I hope this brings comfort for you and your family. Especially, your mother...oh, I had to cry for her...I really can't imagine that first night alone. oh, dear.
    I had to tell you that your blog brought me HUGE encouragement this week...the scriptures at the end of the posts were *exactly* what I needed to read. Thank you.
    Rene

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  19. Love you Janie . . . I totally understand what you are going through. Separation is difficult and something watching someone you love go through so much is over whelming and difficult to digest mentally. Hang in there, love on your Momma, give her all the support you can. Praying for you and your family, especially your Mom and Dad. Stay in the word . . . let go and let God do what he needs to do here. He's guiding your steps already. Blessings, Sandy xox

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  20. He is in good hands. Poor momma...i will lift her up right now.

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  21. Some promises to cling to...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5R54Hbjv70c&feature=related

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  22. Such a difficult decision to make, but the knowledge that he is safe and secure is a blessing. New normal. We always have to readjust it seems. How wonderful that the unit nurse texted you - peace of mind is priceless. Ann

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  23. Oh Janie, my heart hurts for you and your family, and especially for you mom!! Such a horrible disease this is. You and your family know deep down that this was the right decision, of course a very hard decision. My thoughts and prayers for everyone!

    Brenda

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  24. Your mom is beautiful there with those blue eyes! They were married 71 years? How old are they? So did he go right from the house to the unit or from a nursing home to the unit. I had to put my mom in a nursing home and it was the hardest thing I ever did. Best wishes and prayers. sandie

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  25. Wow. You are living some HARD days my friend. I am so sorry. Praying for strength for you, and a whole lot of funny.

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  26. Thinking n praying on you all...
    Xoxoxoxo

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Thanks for reading my blather. I read every comment. They make my heart happy!